Why Revolt?

When I tell people about my year long project, they are amazed by my lofty plans and my commitment. Some days, I am too. When I first got started, I told my therapist: "I don't think I'll be able to do it." She nodded politely and asked what could possibly hold me back.

I knew that there were some days I wouldn't want to think about revolution. I would settle back into day to day living. I knew I could get tired or bored. I also realized there could  be a point where it would seem overwhelming. What could one person change? I can't shoulder this responsibility all by myself. What if no one follows me?

She told me to calm down, get out of my head and take it day by day. Change is slow. Change is difficult. "This must not be whim, right?" she asked me. "This has been weighing on your mind for awhile, right?"

She was right. Nancy is usually right.

I've always been ripe for a protest, but was never in a position to protest. I grew up in a sheltered and strict household where questioning authority wasn't an option. I had jobs where I was exploited for my time and speaking up to defend myself wasn't an option either. School was my only outlet.

It started in high school when I wouldn't stand for the morning Pledge of Allegiance. My ceramics teacher noticed me sitting in my seat, arms crossed, looking stolid.
"Halliburton!" he barked. "Stand for the Pledge."
"No."
"Why not?"
"I won't salute a flag that supports racism and exploitation," I told him defiantly. "I don't pledge to a country built on the backs of slaves."
For some reason, this explanation angered him. "If you won't stand in my class, then go out in the hallway."

I sat in the hallway for every pledge for the rest of that semester. Luckily, he didn't report my protest to the principal or my parents and I felt pretty good about myself.

Well I'm 27 years old now. I'm married, I pay bills, I take care of rabbit. I'm a full grown adult according to the law, but I feel like I have some time to make up for. Now that I'm free to reach my goals. . . I think it's time.